The Funniest Women Awards
Written by Jacob Swenson
Whether we like to admit it or not, we have all been down a sad, three hour minimum WatchMojo rabbit hole. I do not know if there is an innate human desire to have rankings for everything or if Buzzfeed millennials have had such a profound impact on our culture, but somehow I go from watching the “Top 20 Family Feud Fails” to trying to see if they made an updated “Top 10 National Anthem Fails” video so Fergie’s jazzy rendition can be included. Once you find yourself on MsMojo and are looking to see if RuPaul’s fracking made it into the top Drag Race scandals video… then you know you are in way too deep.
So, where am I going with this? Well, when I initially heard the topic for this edition was “Women’s History Month” I planned on doing a classic WatchMojo style list. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I could not rank women based on how funny they are because all of the following women are funny in what they do. So instead of feeding into millennial culture and in honor of Amy Schumer, Wonda Sykes, and Regina Hall hosting the Oscars, I will be giving “awards” to who I think are some of the funniest women in their respective categories.
Before I dive into the “awards,” I want to be clear that this list is very much subjective. My main criteria is simply who makes me audibly laugh out loud. Anyone who knows me knows I love a good LOL and much like the saying “when it rains, it pours,” when Jacob laughs, he LAUGHS. So with that in mind, even if you vehemently disagree with what is to come, please just imagine me convulsing from laughter and struggling to breathe because of my extensive “research,” AKA rewatching clips on YouTube, for this article and maybe, just maybe, you will at least find amusement in how much these women make me cackle.
Funniest Podcaster
This category has the most clear winner for me and that’s Nicole Byer. When I think of podcasters, my mind immediately goes to Nicole. She has about a million podcasts, but my favorite of hers is Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata. The two of them have a perfect dynamic and listening to them feels like you are just talking hot goss with two friends. Nicole has such a fun laugh and listening to her stories always makes me “tee-hee-hee.” I normally skip over ads, but every now and then I will listen to an ad just because Nicole somehow makes it entertaining. Although many other podcasts have advice sections, Nicole’s is the funniest because of how convoluted it can sometimes be.
LOS ANGELES - SEPTEMBER 19: Nicole Byer from Nailed It! attends the 73RD EMMY AWARDS on Sunday, Sept. 19 (8:00-11:00 PM, live ET/5:00-8:00 PM, live PT) on the CBS Television Network and available to stream live and on demand on Paramount+. (Photo by Francis Specker/CBS via Getty Images)
She also hosts Why Won’t You Date Me? where she tries to get to the bottom of why she is still single. In a world where somehow everyone seems boo’d up—or at least everyone on my FYP—Nicole’s dating stories are always a breath of fresh air compared to the typical overly serious discussions of dating.
In addition to podcasts, Nicole is known for hosting Nailed It and Wipeout, two shows where audiences get to laugh at the failure of others. Her standup special BBW (Big Beautiful Weirdo) was released on Netflix last year and she now stars in the NBC sitcom Grand Crew. Nicole was also supposed to go on an American tour this year, but decided to cancel it because of scheduling conflicts. (I was devah-stah-ted.)
Seeing her gain more and more popularity recently has been exciting and I can not wait to see what she has planned moving forward. I have a feeling she will become even more popular in the coming years.
Funniest Singing Competition Judge
Is this a niche category? Possibly, but for those of us who love singing competition shows, there are several possible contenders. JHud should be considered just for the hilarity of her throwing her shoes, Mariah Carey and Nicki Minaj simply just being there on that weird fever-dream season of American Idol is comical, and Simon Cowel just being himself never fails to make me laugh. However, this award would feel wrong if it was given to anyone other than the person who started the singing competition craze–Kelly Clarkson.
LAS VEGAS, NV - MAY 20: Host Kelly Clarkson performs onstage at the 2018 Billboard Music Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on May 20, 2018 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for dcp)
In my opinion, I think Kelly Clarkson is one of the most talented celebrities of our time. I have been a stan ever since I heard “Breakaway” on Princess Diaries and she was one of the first artists I ever downloaded on my old MP3 player.
Kelly is known for her vocals, but she is genuinely hilarious and relatable. Everytime she gets out of her chair on The Voice, you know it will be a moment. Her love for contestants who sing in Spanish, despite not understanding a word they are saying, is also pure comedy to me. Additionally, her facial expressions absolutely kill me and her reactions during Katie Kadan’s blind audition live in my head rent free.
She just has that special something that makes her come across as the funniest drunk aunt at the function. The success of Kelly’s talkshow is a testament of how lovable she is and I am thankful that it created one of the best celebrity interviews ever between her and Sandra Bullock. One of the top YouTube comments describes the interview perfectly, “This is hands down the best talk show interview I've ever seen. It's like their edibles hit at the same time.”
Anyways, I could talk about Kelly Clarkson forever. But please, it has been five years since Meaning of Life, make a new album with original songs ASAP!
Funniest Daytime TV Host
And the award goes to… MEGHAN MCCAIN!
Just kidinggggggg. I hate to admit it, but one of my guilty pleasures is watching The View. Oftentimes much of the commentary is out of touch and problematic, but the show is sometimes TV gold. Part of the reason why I think the show has been so successful is because of Joy Behar. She is the only co-host to have been on the show since its inception and she has consistently brought some much needed comedic relief. Watching Joy and Meghan go at it was one of the only sources of entertainment I could rely on during the Trump administration. Every single one of her roasts for republicans makes me chuckle.
While I do not always agree with her, if Kelly is the funny drunk aunt, then Joy is the cranky Grandma that humbles the whole family on a daily basis. I can confidently say that The View would not be the same without her.
Funniest Impersonation
I will cut straight to the chase with this one: Maya Rudolph’s Kamala Harris. Sure, there are plenty of other amazing impersonations. But for me, this one makes me laugh out loud every time I watch it. The mannerisms, the hair, and just the overall memory of it all scores a 10/10 in my books.
Here are some of my favorite quotes of Maya as Kamala:
“The FUNT is back baby! America’s fun aunt. I’m also America’s cool aunt, the c—...”
“The kind of FUNT that will give you weed, but then arrest you for having weed.”
“You call that human rights, China? I call it human wrongs… Kamala, Sundays on TNT.”
“I’m speaking… I’m speaking… yeah but I’m speaking… see I’m speaking, estoy hablando Nevada, Arizona, some parts of Texas, I’m speaking.”
Funniest Drag Race Guest Judge
Besides Loni Love firing back at Utica, no one comes close to Leslie Jones as a guest judge on Drag Race. Leslie embodied every superfan who has ever dreamed of sitting alongside the judges. Leslie’s online reactions to older seasons are iconic, so we knew we were in for a good time when she was first announced as a guest judge. However, she more than delivered.
She gave some of the funniest commentary on the runway, her pretending to film the queens was hysterical, and just her overall support for each queen made the entire episode top tier. I remember Twitter absolutely living for Leslie when the episode first aired and I probably liked every single tweet asking for her to become a permanent judge.
Drag race producers: please, please, pleaseeeeee bring Leslie back.
Funniest TV Actress
“Mammary Meyer, Grisly Madam, She-ra, Meyer the Liar, the Batcave, Pissface, Wicked Witch of the West Wing, Veep Throat, Voldemeyer, Dickless Van Dyke, Tawdry Hepburn, Blunder Woman, Selina Meh, VaSelina, Betty Poop, Goofy Smile, Vaguely Personable, Viagra Prohibitor, Visible Panties, V-PILF, Mrs. Doubtmeyer…”
That’s right, I’m talking about Julia Louis-Dreyfus playing Selina Meyer on HBO’s Veep. Some people’s comfort shows are Friends, The Office, or New Girl, but mine is Veep. I am sure that says a lot about me, but I have watched the entirety of Veep at least four times because of how much it makes me audibly laugh. While the entire cast of Veep makes the show what it is, I could not imagine the show without Julia Louis-Dreyfus, who happened to win SIX emmys for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series as her role in Veep. I understand that other writers are behind much of the beautiful crass zingers, but Louis-Dreyfus’s delivery is what makes the main character so believable, hateable, and lovable. It is unusual for a show like Veep to have the tenure it had when practically all of its characters are horrible people who in real life would be loathed. However, Julia Louis-Dreyfus made Veep so captivating and drew audiences in to see the shit show that was her team.
LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 20: Actress Julia Louis-Dreyfus, winner of the awards for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series for 'Veep' and Outstanding Comedy Series for 'Veep', poses in the press room at the 67th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards at Microsoft Theater on September 20, 2015 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Mark Davis/Getty Images)
Funniest Movie Actress
Alright, alright, alright… this was the hardest category for me to decide on so I made it a tie. I know ties are boring but both Melissa McCarthy and Rebel Wilson both put me in physical pain from laughter when I watch them on screen. I will see anything and everything starring either of these women.
CULVER CITY, CA - APRIL 14: Host Rebel Wilson and actress Melissa McCarthy onstage during the 2013 MTV Movie Awards at Sony Pictures Studios on April 14, 2013 in Culver City, California. (Photo by Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic)
I frankly do not care if all the characters they play “are all the same” because what they do, they do so well. Spy and Pitch Perfect are genuinely two of my favorite movies and I could watch them a million times and still be entertained by them. If I see spies or singing I will usually enjoy a movie, but these two actresses put these films over the top. Watching Melissa McCarthy eviscerate people to their faces and listening to Rebel Wilson’s accent sends me into absolute orbit. I could probably quote half of Fat Amy’s lines (I mean, Fat Patricia, whoops!) and frequently reference her on at least a weekly basis. As well, Melissa McCarthy’s Sean Spicer is a classic that my entire family laughs together about.
I would be remiss if I did not mention Bridesmaids because it features BOTH Melissa and Rebel, as well as Maya Rudolph, Kristen Wiig, Rose Byrne, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Ellie Kemper, and tons of other familiar faces. Although it is one of those movies that is either loved or hated, I loved it and hope to one day get another movie where Melissa AND Rebel share the screen together.
To emulate WatchMojo: Do you agree with our picks? Check out the other recent articles by Priestly Magazine. And be sure to sign up for email updates, follow us on social media, and turn on notifications so you never miss another hot take!
Yikes, hated that, but there you have it! These are my winners and if you disagree, I would willingly engage in a debate with you. However, fair warning, I would probably make so many references to all of these women that I would be on the floor leaking pee, screaming for a nurse.
Regardless of whether or not you agree with my awardees, let us all finally give women in comedy the props they deserve. Too often, funny women are overlooked or have their success attributed to only being women. However, without these wonderful individuals, the world would have less laughter and my YouTube search history would consist of a lot less funny compilation videos. So go out, be thankful for the humor of these women, and just pretend you can hear my witch-like cackle the next time you consume their content. ❀
